Being Kind to Your Dragons

A couple of weeks ago, we talked about the benefits of naming your Dragons. Last week, we talked about how you can invite them for tea and how this can help you in the coaching process. This week, I want to invite you to use a kind eye on your Dragons.

A couple of years ago, I read a great book about rebuilding after bereavement called Second Firsts by Christina Rasmussen. Amongst the other useful ideas in the book, she talks about the idea of a Waiting Room. Like an old-fashioned train station. And the Waiting Room has a Guardian. The Guardian’s job – although they sometimes do it by saying unpleasant or scary things – is to keep you safe in what has become a familiar space between your old life and your new one. A Safe Room.

In my personal and professional experience of Dragons, although they can look pretty daunting and say some horrible things, it is not uncommon that they also work like the Guardian trying to keep you Safe. Don’t try….so you can’t fail. Don’t challenge….so you won’t be rejected. Don’t want….so you won’t lose.

This may be the very reason why it can feels like the Dragons move in and camp on our couch when we are trying to renovate or build something important to us. And why perhaps inviting them in for tea and treating them with a little respect and kindness can be useful.

What do you think your Dragons are trying to safeguard you from? And how much does that matter compared to what you are trying to build?

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